How to train your mind to stop overthinking? Strategies from OCD Counseling in Boston, MA
Everyone has moments of overthinking — it’s part of being human. It’s not something that only happens to people who struggle with their mental health. But when overthinking starts to take up a lot of your time, distracts you from what matters most, and makes it hard to connect with others or enjoy your life, it can start to feel like your thoughts are running the show instead of you. That kind of mental looping can be exhausting and painful. In OCD therapy, we often refer to this as rumination, and it’s something that can drive both anxiety and OCD.
What is Rumination?
So, what does rumination actually look like?
Ruminating means thinking about the same thing over and over again. It’s not productive, and it’s not the same as problem-solving. True problem-solving looks like reviewing your options, making a decision, and then moving forward with your life. Rumination, on the other hand, keeps you mentally stuck — replaying the same questions, fears, or “what ifs” without ever reaching a sense of resolution.
Real Life Example
To make this clearer, let’s look at an example of what rumination can look like in real life.
For instance, someone with health anxiety might find themselves repeatedly worrying that they have a serious illness, even when there’s no real evidence to support it. On the outside, they might appear to be functioning fine — going to work, taking care of responsibilities — but internally, they’re stuck in a painful cycle of doubt and fear. Their mind keeps circling back to the same thoughts: What if I missed something? What if the doctor was wrong? What if this tiny symptom means something serious? That mental tug-of-war can make it hard to feel present, connected, or at peace.
Now that you have a sense of what rumination looks like, let’s talk about how to work with it.
Why Standard Coping Skills Often Don’t Work for OCD and Overthinking
When you’re dealing with OCD or a related condition, the concept of “coping skills” can get tricky. For most types of stress or anxiety, many therapists teach relaxation strategies — things like deep breathing, grounding exercises, or guided imagery. But with OCD and compulsive rumination, those kinds of coping skills usually backfire. That’s because when you try to make a thought or anxious feeling go away, you’re actually doing what’s called a compulsion. People with OCD or compulsive rumination often fall into this trap — they use coping skills to try to “fix” or erase a thought, which just ends up reinforcing the rumination.
Your brain is wired to pay attention to things it believes are dangerous. So when you react to intrusive or repetitive thoughts with urgency or attempts to “fix” them, your brain continues flagging them as important and dangerous. To reduce overthinking, we have to teach the mind, gently and consistently, that these thoughts aren’t actually dangerous or meaningful. We do that not by pushing the thoughts away, but by giving them less attention and energy.
Practical Strategies to Turn Away from Overthinking & Rumination
There are many therapeutic skills used to help reduce rumination, but I’ll share a few of my favorites.
Notice your Cues
First, learn to notice your “cues.” These are the mental phrases or triggers that signal you’re about to start overthinking — things like:
“What if…?”
“This must mean…”
“Oh my god!”
When you notice these thoughts starting to form, your job isn’t to answer the “what if” question or analyze what “this must mean.” Instead, this is your signal to turn away. You might even say to yourself phrases like, “I’m not going there,” or “I’m not going down that rabbit hole.” Then, gently redirect your attention back to what you were doing — not in a forced or rushed way, but with a sense of grounded awareness.
It can help to think of this process like when you’re in a meeting or a class and your mind starts to drift into a daydream. At some point, you realize you’ve lost focus. You don’t panic or berate yourself — you simply notice, and then bring your attention back to the present moment. Turning away from rumination works the same way. When you catch yourself looping on a thought, simply notice it, label it for what it is — “Oh, that’s rumination” — and turn back to your life.
Each time you do this, even if the anxiety is still there, you’re teaching your brain that the thought isn’t worth engaging with. Over time, your anxiety naturally settles down because your mind learns that it doesn’t need to keep fighting the thought.
Exposure Statements
Another helpful tool is using exposure statements. These are short phrases that help you practice accepting uncertainty — because a big part of what fuels rumination is the desperate need to know for sure. Exposure statements can sound like:
“Maybe, maybe not.”
“There’s no way to know for sure.”
“Nothing I can do about it right now.”
“That would suck.”
“It’s too late- nothing I can do about it now.”
At first, using these statements might make your anxiety spike — and that’s okay. The goal isn’t to feel instantly better; it’s to show your brain that uncertainty isn’t dangerous. The more you practice turning away from rumination and leaning into not knowing, the more your brain learns that it can handle uncertainty without constant reassurance or analysis.
Important Note from an OCD Therapist in Boston
One important thing to keep in mind is that even these tools — noticing cues, turning away, or using exposure statements — can themselves become compulsive.
For example, if you find yourself constantly checking whether your OCD is gone or waiting to feel relief after using a skill, that’s still part of the rumination cycle. The goal isn’t to get rid of thoughts or anxiety; it’s to change how you respond to them. Trust that if you keep practicing, your relationship to anxiety and fear will change— not because you forced it, but because your brain has learned to stop fighting what isn’t actually dangerous. Keep turning your attention back to your life, even when the urge to check or analyze shows up. Let time and consistency do their work.
This is a big topic — one that deserves more space than a single post can cover. In an upcoming blog, I’ll write more about how to build on these strategies. With time and consistent practice, many people learn to step out of the cycle of overthinking. Check out my next blog here: How to Train Your Mind to Stop Overthinking (Part two).
OCD & Anxiety Therapy for Overthinking
If you’re struggling with overthinking, intrusive thoughts, or endless mental loops that leave you feeling stuck, therapy can help you find relief. I offer OCD and anxiety therapy in Boston, MA and Los Angeles, CA. At Jen Lescher LSWC Inc., I support clients who want to understand their patterns and learn practical, evidence-based ways to stop letting rumination take over.
As your therapist, we’ll look closely at how your anxiety shows up, whether it’s replaying conversations, worrying about health or relationships, or getting caught in “what if” spirals. Together, we’ll use approaches drawn from Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) to help you change your relationship to your thoughts, rather than fighting them. These methods are proven to help people reduce obsessive thinking and anxiety, so you can feel more grounded and connected to your life again.
I also work with clients who experience specific OCD themes, such as health anxiety, relationship OCD (ROCD), harm OCD, and more.
Online therapy makes it possible to access specialized OCD and anxiety treatment from the comfort of your own space, so you can start learning tools that actually work for your mind.
Therapy That Helps You Reclaim Your Time and Energy
If you’ve been caught in the cycle of overthinking, replaying conversations, analyzing decisions, or trying to find absolute certainty — it’s understandable that you’re tired. That constant mental back-and-forth can feel like it’s stealing your peace, your focus, and even your joy.
Whether you’re struggling with OCD, anxiety, or chronic overthinking, you don’t have to figure it out alone. I offer OCD counseling in Boston, MA and Los Angeles, CA, as well as online sessions across both states. You deserve peace, and I'd love to walk this journey alongside you.
Explore my blog posts for more insights into overthinking, rumination, and OCD.
Together, we’ll work on helping your mind feel a little lighter, one step at a time.
Additional Services Offered
Along with one-on-one OCD therapy, I also offer supportive resources that address challenges many clients face outside of sessions. On the Common OCD Themes page, you can explore detailed insights into recurring thoughts and behaviors. The OCD and Social Life page offers guidance for managing friendships, dating, and relationships while living with OCD and anxiety. These resources are designed to complement therapy by providing practical tools and new perspectives, extending your growth and healing beyond the therapy room.
About the Author
I’m a therapist, coffee enthusiast (honestly, it’s my favorite ritual of the day), and a big believer in finding small moments of presence—whether that’s through mindfulness, photography, or a quiet walk with my camera in hand. Photography helps me stay grounded and see the world with a little more curiosity, and that same mindset shows up in my work with clients. I’ve been drawn to spirituality and healing work since I was a teenager, exploring everything from meditation to energy practices. But I’m also someone who loves blasting music in the car and getting lost in a true crime podcast. I think healing can include both stillness and movement, reflection and laughter. Therapy should have room for all of that. Since 2007, I’ve worked in a range of mental health settings, which taught me that healing isn’t one-size-fits-all. It’s personal, evolving, and sometimes messy—but always possible.
Training & Background:
Inference-Based CBT (ICBT) for OCD – The OCD Training School & The Cognitive Behavioral Institute
Certified in Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) – The Cognitive Behavioral Institute
Gottman Method Couples Therapy – Level 1
Master’s in Social Work – Portland State University, 2012
